17. “She openeth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” Proverbs 31:26

It seems to me Solomon listed the most important qualities last.

I don't know about you but there are days when this verse feels like it is about as far from me as it can get. I am sure we all have days like this, but I sure wish I could fit this description far more often.

The Bible tells us two ways to get wisdom. The first is listed several times in Proverbs; "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom." So by choosing to fear the Lord we set ourselves on the path to gaining wisdom.

Some books I have read say “fear” here means to respect God. Though that is part of it, I am not quite sure it is all. I take the Bible at face value, so when it says, "fear" I think it means "fear," as in "to be afraid of." "God is love" and sometimes we have trouble equating this with Him being something to fear. But the Bible says to "fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.”

You see, God does love us very much, so much He chose to go to Calvary for us. But He IS the ALMIGHTY GOD. He can end our existence right this minute if He chooses. The Bible lists times of God displaying anger and punishing the disobedient severely. It is a good thing for the human race that He is very patient.

Jesus gave us two commandments;
(1) To follow and love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength and
(2) Love your neighbor as yourself.

God wants us to love Him unconditionally, that's obvious. But I think it is important to have a fear of Him, also.

Should we be shaking in our boots afraid He is going to strike us dead any minute? Maybe, for we do all deserve it.

However, the older I get the more I have discovered a different kind of "fear of the Lord." You see, I am afraid of making Him frown, making Him sad.

The best comparison I can think of is how I feel towards my husband. I have no reason to fear for my physical safety with my man. Quite the contrary, he is my protector and I feel very safe and secure whenever I am with him. I love him so much I want nothing more than to please him and see him happy. When I say or do something to accidentally hurt him, it makes me incredibly sad; not because of some feared bad results to me, but just because he is sad.

Even if I am not the cause of his sadness, I am sad when he is and want to fix it if I can.

Though I believe God is worthy of our fear (terror?) I find myself increasingly making life's decisions by which course will bring a smile to God's face, so to speak. I am very saddened when I discover I have done something to make Him sad. I "fear" His frown and I can't think of a better word to describe it. I "fear," not so much because of feared consequences to me but because I want no more than to make Him happy.

How wonderful life would be if everyone had as their goal to bring a smile to God's Face.

The second method of obtaining wisdom I have found in the Bible is found in the book of James.
"If any man lacks wisdom let him ask of God who gives liberally."

So the second way to learn to "open our mouths with wisdom" is to simply ask God for it.

I have often wondered how many blessings we miss out on just because we don't ask.

Now, I don't believe we can ask for a million dollars and God will just give it to us. I don't think money is very important to tell you the truth. It is only useful to buy the important things and too much money can very much interfere with our happiness.

I do think of my children, though. There are times I would let them do something special or have a treat if they asked for it. I don't necessarily think of it, but would not mind if they did.

I know it is not quite the same with God, but how many things could we have if we only thought to ask. The Bible says we can ask for wisdom and God will give it to us liberally. How many of us have bothered to ask for wisdom? Or patience? Or peace? Or Joy? How much better could our lives be if we would think to ask for those things that will really matter?

I find myself too often asking for things that are not so important, thinking they will bring happiness in some form. Those things God has said are important, the Fruits of the Spirit, (Love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faith, gentleness and meekness) are what will bring real happiness, not lots of money, big houses or fancier clothes.

In fact, when we seek these things, aren't we seeking those qualities of the Fruits, thinking these material items will bring love, joy or peace?

I ask God for wisdom often. I feel very lacking in this department, but I do think He is guiding me on a path to more wisdom daily. And I find this path is also the path to kindness. The more I understand, the closer I get to being wise and the more I find myself speaking with kindness. The two go hand in hand.

Maybe cruelty and harshness are more a result of a lack of wisdom than we realize. I don't mean knowledge or information, though the Bible also says "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge." You can be very intelligent, very informed and still be unwise. (Sigh, I really want to say "stupid." I guess I had better work on that "kindness" some more).

Kindness, however, seems to come with a true understanding of God's way. It comes with wisdom.

You see, God's law IS kindness. The laws He wrote in the Bible are not put there to spoil our fun but to keep us safe and give us the best life possible. His very commands are kindness to us; much like my telling my children not to play with fire is for their protection, not to rob them of their fun.

If we fear God's displeasure, we will grow in wisdom. When we grow in wisdom we grow in kindness. When we grow in kindness, everyone around us including we, ourselves, benefit.

Choosing this path does seem like the first step in wisdom. Maybe, some day it will be said of me that, "She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness” if I continue to fear the Lord.